Whose that guy......Patrick G Marshall

A handsome chocolate brother with arms of steel that makes you melt every time you give him a hug... A man with ambition and drive to become the greatest thing every!!! And it turns me on (wink)...

Not only is this man sexy but he has brains to match... He's smart and funny....

Patrick is the ideal man he has that sexy voice you want to hear in the morning saying "good morning mama"...Damn I luv when a man calls me "mama"....LOL... But he is so sweet it makes you wonder why the HELL!!! these others asswholes aint taking notes!!! Those eyes of his always makes a woman's heart quicken when he smiles at you...that makes me realize why others liking him is no mistake. I look forward to seeing him.... I don't know what you would say if I ever told you what a great man you are or how some may feel sometimes wishing they could just walk up to you and tell you everything if it was just that simple.... I wonder if you would feel the same maybe not but someone is still dreaming about those wonderful words going out of you.... Wishing that your hand would grab theirs one day and that your lips would graze a woman's lips just so these thoughts linger and makes women wonder if it could happen for real if they could be that one.....

I know he is going to be pist at me...But Patrick I had to let the ladies know what a great man you are and hopefully there are more like you out there....

Till Next Time....

Love Live Life

Another Year!!!

Woow again we meet. The time that we all been anticipating a NEW YEAR!!!

A new year to do things different, become a better you, get more out of life, and become closer with the almighty GOD!!!

Around this time I tend to make resolutions or something but I have so many things that I want to be different that I cant even think of where to start...smh...

Well one of my resolutions is a reallly big one and I think I might keep that one to myself just to make sure it goes through...Lets just say Im about to delete alot of mutha fuckas and they dont know it yet!! Im sneaky huh naw just SICK OF IT!!!!

Its a new year and one thing I do want to make sure is to make money and continue to make more each month..... I have always been the one to blow money but why not shit you work day in and day out why not splurge ever now and then....but on a serious note I gotta control that shit because in the long run its not going to pay off....

But another resolution is to get a car...yes folks I gotta get a new fuckin car AGAIN!!! SMH!!! FUCK!!!......

OK Im ok now.... but yea my jetta is officially gone the repo man is coming to get black beauty (TEAR).... But its coo l on to a new adventure...the Infiniti FX35 and yes please believe you will see me in the black joint...Love black cars!!! This is something that I thought I wouldnt have to come back too but unfortunately with me not working for about 4 months now I couldnt hold on to the car for long...(TEAR) she will be missed....

On another note, my next resolution is to become more patient and focus on the important things that will make me into something better or make me more money....If its not on that note Im not WITH IT!!!! Every year I become more of an aggressive person to show others that Im on some other shit...I have few bitches around me now so that was something I always had a hell of allot of friends...Not anymore I know who are the real bitches and they stand strong with ya girl till the end...So as this year starts my life starts... A new man!!! Yes the 4 year single shit is going to end!!!! I deserve to be happy and enjoy the one...The one that will make me smile, the one I dream about, the one I want holding me at night, the one that is my man and ONLY mine!!!

I do have a few guys friends but fuck them its time for a change and its about me and what I want... Yeah there is someone I am thinking about pursuing but I first must know if he wants to get on a serious level because this aint no 2 year run....but I am going to make a change that will hurt alot of people but I have been hurt for soo long that I can no longer contain myself!!!

So this year will be a happier Sandra, a more focused Sandra, is making more money Sandra, is happy with her MAN Sandra, a more content Sandra with where she wants to be... I will have a job, a new car, a new man, and a new life beginning!!!!

You lay round and see!!!!

I spoke it into existence and it shall happen upon what faith will bring.....

Till Next Time....

Love Live Life......

Shit Just Dont Change

I paid my fair I know my destination....like Kayne West stated...I have been vibin his album because it speaks the truth in most aspects of life...I feel like Nightmares is what Im feeling like weezy states "I got the right, to put up a fight, but not quite, cause you kut off my light, but my sight, is better tonight, and I might, see you in my nightmares, how did you get there, cause we were once a fairy tail....but this is fare well!!!!





This thing with guys are replaying and shit just keeps continuing the same way that it becomes nightmares to me in a sense that I really start to think otherwise and am I gonna be able to move on from what has started, such a good thing but ending up a disaster!!!! In a place where i cant run back into...I fight to get more out of a person and yet I get the usual....Im not saying every guy is the same but its just that its gotta end some time... when the usual changes into somthing different..... I get calls from you know the drunkies that is looking to get laid cause they drunk and shit...LOL nigga please....But this life is not going to happen...

I have issues when it comes to men...I cant never win....But its soo hard to win with guys now a days everybody thinks your a liar or you aint keeping it real... I had a guy today that swore me down I had a man...Shit I wish!! LOL...But naw he wouldnt take my word for it nor would he just respect the fact that I am single.... Yes everybody I am single... why am I single its because Im afraid.....Literally!!!! afraid of failure, afraid of getting hurt, afraid to fall in love again, afraid of men just doing something to fuck up my damn world!!! I am such an emotional wreck because not only is my life getting in the way from me getting to know people a little better but my head wont let go of shit.....I keep thinking everybody out to hurt me and thats not the case...I keep thinking this nigga gonna be kool and then the bomb explodes.....I know I know....you cant go into something thinking like that but what if that shit keep happening.... damn it smh.....But soon I can enjoy life with a man and maybe even have kids...right now my head hurts and I need a joint!!!




Till Next Time....









Love Live Life......

Christmas woooow again!!!

Its about that time again giving gifts being with family and enjoyng life during the holidays...


My Christmas to basically been the same the past few years...I really don't give gifts and I don't expect to get any as well...Not to sound like a Grinch but Christmas is not the same anymore...Maybe when we were kids this was the most exciting part of the year!!!! But its kool


Christmas is OK for the most part... Relaxing with family and just looking at the bright side of things..My Christmas gift was me finally getting the job that pay decent money... I finally took the urine test to work for AT&T and did good on the face to face interview so they offered me the position and to continue the employment process...So I have done all the necessary things to get the position so I am just waiting on the phone call!!!! SO I have been praying for this blessing for awhile and ready to work!!!! So hopefully soon I will be at the job gettin it!! LOL....But that was my Christmas gift and the new year is looking in my favor to get out of this BIG WHOLE I'm in right now....But its cool life is a big test either you past or you fail!!!! Like I always say...My life is being tested by the day and its up to me to pass the test.....


Merry Christmas to ALL!!!




Till Next Time



Love Live Life

Big Daddy....

A moment to release yourself on a man at times where this couldn't be possible....

all over him kissing and rubbing until you find your self almost trembling with excitement...

Tempted to touch, taste, and explore one another to a level of n return...

Watching each other squirm and move and gasp for that temptation air that has you in this position anyway....Grabbing his BIG arms that turns you in any moment while he grabs your butt as if its the best thing EVER!!!

Kissing sexually as if someone was watching and you were getting turned on by IT!!

Cloths are taken OFF where flesh on flesh begin to bind into ONE!!!

He slowly penetrate where the feeling fills your insides up with such pleasure...

Pleasure to squeeze more and more because of such a feeling you never expected....

In and Out of you he goes with such grace that a moan gets you screaming for more....

He flips you over and slaps it to only give you the assurance he is about to give you the business...

He places that great hand in the middle of your spine while he makes you yearn for whats about to enter your pretty world of what every man wants....

You cant believe the temptation of what has occurred because you want more...more of daddy d*** that makes you weak thinking of it....crying a river as he just shows you whose BOSS!!!

Boss he is yes sir pleased with a smile waiting for another time another time for PENETRATION!!!!

Sleep on that....

Till next time.....

Love Live Life....

Somebody that your NOT!!!

Life takes you in so many directions... Directions in which some of the things you may do that you don't agree on or you do...I find myself doing things for others and worried about how they would feel about me than doing me and putting me first....

I guess you can say I never put myself first for some reason... I'm too busy worried about what other people likes and dislikes are I can only live a world that I can handle and I was put in a position where I thought I would be ready but little did I know I was totally not ready for what was going to happen next or how I was gonna feel after wards..... I keep thinking too myself that I should go about things a different way than just letting things happen... I get ideas from others and take it, but for what? its always not good advice than you thought when you first did it.....I have so much pain inside, frustration , and just got damn it CONFUSED!!!! About so much, now I think that others are viewing me as a different person than I am... I gotta stop putting myself in a situation that will hurt me not better me... I gotta put myself first before others.... I gotta get this world of mine in control before it explodes!!! Explodes to little bits of pieces!!!!

Pray.....

Till next time

Love Live Life

And Cant Stop Poppin These Vision I Gotta Get With It.......

I live a life mix with confusion and fustration that come in a variety of shapes and colors....
Not only is this life not so great but shit its a roller coaster you cant get off....
I dream of air, fresh air to breath and experience life....
Where is good LIFE you work hard and still get NOTHING!!!
Amazed by some events in your life that gives you the impression that LIFE
IS NICE....
Then comes the storm and it drowns you for all life and relization of what may come your way at any time but you strive to get through....
What if you get through but it REPLAYS in your life every year....
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER!!!!!
What happens when you just give up on life....
Are you now not strong enough...But who determines you being strong BUT YOU....
You make up how strong or how hard you gonna go to get through life....
Are you living?? Or Are you exisiting?? Life is our obstacle through strength of which we need to survive in this world...
God is our man in crime our saviour almighty man in which we confide in at all times!!!
But you need him to guide you...Put you in the position where life will be unbeliveable....
When does life begin when all you see is rain!!! You begin to pray and cry your river to exit that pain you have felt for years...A ginx that wont go away until GOD lets it go....
Move on through life untouchable otherwise haterz and others will drag you down..
You hold your head up and always smile with just a little evil look that triggers in your head that you know they gonna have to see you soon...
Soon to be on point wondering where you been and wanna join the team.....

Hahaha life aint gone get me I GOTTA GET WIT IT.....




Till next time


Love Live Life

Mr. Temptation....

This was posted by another blogger but its so how Im feeling right now!!!! Thanks hun!!!!!




Mr. Temptation...Its you I dream of tastingAnd you can take that how you want just know I really mean tastingI must admit you have me feeling some type of wayYou got me speechless and that doesn't happen every dayTo your advances I really do not know what to sayI guess "no" would be correct but I really want to say "okay"I know its wrong to even entertain these thoughts in my headTrying to find that loophole that allows you into my bedFor so long Ive kept a distance between you and IToo afraid to risk my heart by giving the "bad guy" a tryBut now temptation has risen like foreign water tsunamisIf only we had met up in rather different surroundingsUnder different circumstances the choice would already be madeBottom line by now I would already be laidYou got me...Having sweet dreams about sweet kisses being planted down my spineDirty words being exchanged from your lips to mineA voice so baritone voicing your lustful intentionsHas me thinking about things I should be too shy to mentionThings I really shouldn't be thinking at allLike, I bet you're strong enough to take me up against a wallI bet you could do just the right things to just the right placesHave me sprung -jotting your name with hearts and smiley facesI don't want love, I'm thinking more like "friends with benefits"My heart knows this is wrong but my body is screaming the oppositeFor once in my life I want to just live without limitsLive life for a day where my body makes the decisionsI know this aint realistic but these are my true feelingsI'll let you know when I'm ready and I hope then you'll be willingMr. Temptation...am I tempting you too?

And Tomorrow

Today is filled with anger

fueled with hidden hate

scared of being an outcast

afraid of common fate

Today is built on tragedies

which no one wants 2 face

nightmares 2 humanities

and morally disgraced

Tonight is filled with rage

violence in the air

children bred with ruthlessness

because no one at home cares

Tonight I lay my head down

but the pressure never stops

knawing at my sanity

content when I am dropped

But 2morrow I c change

a chance 2 build a NEW

Built on spirit intent of Heart

and ideals based on truth

and tomorrow I wake with second wind

and strong because of pride

2 know I fought with all my heart 2 keep my dream alive....

Friends with benefits....

I have come to the conclusion even friends with benefits with no strings attached still LIE!!! WTF what for? You are not obligated to that person but they insist on not letting you know the run down which is stupid...But anyway having a friend with benefits no strings sometimes gets on your nerves....For instance you chilling with your friend yall vibe and everything but as soon as he doesn't wanna fuck with you that night he goes to another but wont tell you whats up hey aint nothing tonight Im chilling with so and so...But instead a man does the opposite lies and says he is just going to chill and he will be back to satisfy you...But yes I do understand that he doesn't have to tell you or me a damn thang but for me and how I do things I keep it real all the way around....Guys tend to be worried about feelings but who cares I don't. I neever wear my feelings on my shoulders when it comes to guys that are just friends with benefits. The reason why is because I already no what time it is and I'm not expecting it to go further than fucking...... I have been single for 3 years and its been cool for the most part...At times its stressful, lonely, and just sometimes depressing.... Everyone always wants someone to call there own and know that they are faithful and honest to one another and it works..... Now a days everybody is on the friend tip for some reason smh...But how long can you be someones friend with benefits before someone actually wants more....



Till Next time....

Love love Life....

Thanks for being my friend

I don’t think you know what you mean to me
But you mean a lot
The chance of us not being friends
Is a real long shot
I hate when you’re sad
I love it when you’re happy
Because if your upset
It makes me feel crappy
Thanks for always being there
When I needed you most
If it weren’t for you the chances of me not being here
Would have really come close
I don’t know what I would do
If you weren’t my friendI don’t think my heart
Would ever mend
I hope you know I always have your back
Just like you’ve had mine
And it will always stay that way
Until the end of time
We’ll be friends
Hopefully without end
So I just wanna say thanks
Thanks for being my friend.... And soooonnn......to be continued...



PS... Im truely sorry....

Why???????????????

My life has always resorted to that question why? I always try to be the best at whatever I do or try to be that person that you love to hate lol...But no on a serious note I have been trying to let go of someone and I official have moved on but thought I was gonna be able to move onto what I wanted. And that was to be happy and be treated the way I have always wanted BEING APPRECIATED!!!! Today was mad crazy for me....first I get to my interview and there is a crime sence unit outside of the office and they closed the entire floor off which was where my interview was...smh!!! So OK no sweat they will reschedule so that's cool...I also dropped off a resume to a hotel being built so that was a good thing also but yet not satisfying because I wasn't hired....smh!!! But I also went by an agency and asked about positions they may have but they had none...So I cancelled my lunch time with a friend to go to an agency that didn't have anything but when talking to someone over the phone they made it seem as if they had jobs like TODAY available but they didn't...So that sucks missed my lunch date and no jobs this sucks!!! So I finally get the nerve to do my presentation today which went good I got a "B" I was nervous but I did it!!! Even though I was so uncomfrontable in this damn skirt suit and stockings...LOL...But after the presentation I saw something I didn't want to see.... I saw someone that I think is potential speaking to his ex...Now mind you I could not see from a far so I pissed and said "whats up black"? and all I got was whats up homey.....smh!!! damn what the hell!!!!!!! I didn't think I was gonna get that response and I cant believe I was kinda jealous but not in a way because I knew the day would come again..... Now this is my whole thing HISTORY OUT PLAYS ANYTHING NEW!!!!! And I want everybody to know that because as much as we new chicks to these niggaz, as soon as the old bitch comes back its off with you and in with HER!!! Damn that's fucked up.....This is why my guard stay up for sooooo long with guys because I feel as soon as I let up I get dissed!!!! But its cool no love lost!!! Still care but just cautions to allot of things now and now my mind is racing with thoughts of different things.......Should I be the same or should I go back to being the friend and not going further...I don't know my head hurts with dumb shit that I don't need to be focused on right now......


Till next time....


Love Live Life

What a day!!!

Today was pretty good...Woke up took a shower and thank god for waking me up.....Went out to publix, did some shopping and then checked my account and what do you know some unexpected cash was deposited yes sir I got check....Hell yeah!!!!LOL....But I was glad because I needed a few extra bucks so it helped...so I get a phone call today from an isurance company that wants to interview me tomorrow 11:00 AM so I am so excited and ready to KISS some ASS to get the JOB!!!!!!! I dont know if anybody feel me but I need a job and once I get it I aint let it go NO TIME SOOOOONNNN!!!!! So I hope all goes well if not there is always the back up plan a hotel is being built and they have an open house tomorrow so that should be good.....So things can go really good for me this week and my prayers will be answered. But besides the good news I have been feeling really good about alot of things that have come up into my life and the changes Im doing to make my life muuch easier.....I dont know but whatever it is that got me smiling keep doing it because Im starting to like it.....

Till next time.....

Love Live Life

Secrects of a MAN

Everyday in life as women we meet thousands of men who state they are a man! Smh dont think so. I am someone who looks for a real man and sometimes get perpetrators. I have a few guy friends(maybe 2) but there is one in particular that I dont think is a real man.... He puts on this front as if he is keeping it so real . But a man will not call a woman out of there name, a real man will admit there mistakes, a real man will not hit on a woman for any reason, a real man will not try to get you upset by fucking with another girl, a real man will not make you feel like you are less than a woman, a real man will not degrade you when others are around,a real man will not give you orders as if your there slave, a real man will not play the feild and act like you wouldnt find out.... a real man is hard to find. I have been a victim of a FAKE ASS MAN!!!! Seee we go back and forth all the time but I'm starting to question is this worth going through for someone who thinks your a nobody puts everybody in front of you but you were ALWAYS the one who had his back day in and day out. I cry and get stressed over a man but no more will san be the victim. Why should I have to prove myself to him by buying him things, by doing everything possible for him, by loving a man more than anything but gets his ass to kiss everytime. Often times we talk and try to make since of what is so speacial about our particular relationship but it still remains the same san is just san and this will not go further than just friends (even though I am the best woman any man could have).... So I ask my fellow face book people where are the real men, where are the men that treats a woman with high standards and just supports them. Where are the men who keep it real from day one and not playing games.... My heart is torn and I dont think I can get into anything because it seems as if the same men are around THESE FAKE ASS MEN!!!!


SAN....